I still miss my husband. I still cry sometimes.
I want love again, but I’m not finding the right fit. I’m not connecting.
I’m bouncing around dating, not dating, dating again. Offline, online, offline, online…
Luckily, I’m happy in my career as a personal trainer… I love helping other people.
I wish I could help myself.
My career is giving me the stability I crave. I’m so thankful. It’s the one thing that keeps me sane and gives my life meaning.
Being married gave my life meaning and gave me the stability I love so much.
My personal life chaos is from dating and talking/texting with a few (several) men at the same time. Some claim it’s the right way to go (play the field), but it isn’t the right way for me. I really only want to talk to one man at a time… I just want one man. The right man.
And I’m sure none of these men are right for me.
1-Middle-of-the-night-drunk texter… Fun, entertaining, but not a good fit.
2-He wants to see me and makes vague dates with me or says he’ll call, but he doesn’t follow through… mind f-ing. I need to get away and save myself.
3-One of the men I dated before… not sure why I’d even try he didn’t like me enough the first time.
4-Friend who could potentially be more, but he’s aloof and puts in zero effort… There is no point.
5-A man who lives in a different state. neither of us is moving soooo… No.
6-The man from the gym, another trainer, who continues to ask me out… not going to ruin my career or my happiness.
7-And that brings me back to my ex, who I still love, who will be in town in a month and wants to see me… I’m not sure what I’ll do.