If a Man…? Please Help

If a man I’ve been dating continues to tell me how attractive and put together the women he’s dated in the past are, what is he really trying to tell me?

A. He’s insecure

B. He only cares about looks

C. He’s trying to make me insecure

D. He just doesn’t know any better

E. He thinks it makes him seem more desirable

F. Other

 

Please help!

Thank you!

Eve

I Stopped Texting Him… Now He’s Interested Again

So, the one I really liked (Liking Men Who Don’t Like Me Back) won’t stop texting, calling and asking me out.

But every time I say yes to him, he seems to lose interest in me all over again.

Now I’ve lost interest… In fact, I’ve lost interest in dating in general. I’m taking another break.

Although I’ve learned a lot about me, I still have a long way to go. I’m enjoying the journey. And I have enjoyed the dating; I think it has helped me discover more about myself.

Maybe a little drastic, but I deleted all men’s phone numbers from my phone so I won’t be tempted.

Surprisingly, I feel lighter and happier and more focused on my work and my life. WHO KNEW?!

Eve

One of Those Days… Online Dating

So unsure of my next step.

Thought I met somebody with potential, but I was wrong. And he hasn’t called or texted.

Getting back out there is comical. A 27 year old reached out. He messaged me with a joke. I’m sure most asked for the punchline, but I messaged back, “I can already tell you’re not funny.”

“That’s not what my yearbook says,” he replied.

Ok, so he’s a little funny.

Why am I messaging with a 27 year old? Ugh!

Then an age appropriate man messaged, “Let’s talk.” Much better. Seemed alpha and I like that.

I noticed he was from another state so I deleted his message without responding. Within minutes, I received another message from him, “I’m still trying.”

Maybe if he was closer…

Moral of this story: MEN ARE AWESOME! Older, younger, I just like them…

But I want to find the one. Just one. The one I can laugh with, cuddle with, be safe with, and love for the rest of my life.

 Eve

A Phone Call From My Ex

My ex called me last night.

He told me he loved me.

I told him I loved him too.

He said he’d like to see me.

I said that would be nice.

He called me honey.

That surprised me.

I chalked it up as a moment of weakness.

I wasn’t weak.

~

If I get a couple of those phone calls, maybe I’ll have to put some thought into it.

He’s still the best man I’ve ever known.

But I’m hopeful I’ll meet another wonderful man who I can spend the rest of my life with.

For now, I’ll keep dating. I’ll keep working on me. I’ll keep working on my passions and career. I’ll keep spending time with friends.

And maybe, in a small corner in the back of my mind, I’ll wonder if my ex misses me. I’ll wonder if the time apart has made me a more attractive person. I’ll wonder if I have changed enough that I wouldn’t want him back or maybe I would…

Eve 

 

I’m Back On Line… Dating

I’ve been dating. Mainly coffee meetings, calls and texts.

I’m fine with that for now.

I’m not really sure what I want and until I figure that out, is there really a point in any of this?

Maybe it all comes down to distraction…

Maybe I want a man to keep me from my dreams and goals.

Maybe I’ve lost sight of what I want, my career, MY future.

Maybe I’ve lost sight of how amazing I am.

Maybe I want a man to think I’m amazing… but how can he, if I don’t think I’m amazing?

Eve

Back From My Eventful Trip, Work Romance?

Loved the getaway!

A work friend was hoping to have a fling (or maybe more) with me.

We had dinner together. Tempting… Single. Muscular. Attractive. Intriguing. Very intriguing… but still, no.

I’m trying to keep my life simple. I don’t want drama and I don’t want to mix my personal life with work. I love my work. I don’t ever want to feel uncomfortable at work. We will remain friends and co-workers.

Since returning from my trip, I have focused on my home and to-do list. I’m in a great place right now. I’m caught up! Yay!

But with that comes… boredom, loneliness…

So, I’m back online.

We’ll see…

Eve

 

The Men I’ve Dated Since My #Divorce

Because I’m at this crossroads… to date or not to date…

I’ve decided to learn more about myself.

I already know my childhood wasn’t ideal, but I know we all did the best we could do. I’m not perfect. My family isn’t perfect. I have no hard feelings.

I also hold no hard feelings toward my ex husband. He didn’t want to be with me anymore. Though I never would have left him, I’m not him. And I don’t want to be with somebody who doesn’t want to be with me. It’s pretty simple. Heartbreaking, but simple.

Searching for answers, I asked the two men dated after my divorce, “What was the hardest part about dating me?”

This is what they told me:

“I couldn’t get close to you.”

“You always kept me at arm’s distance.”

“You wouldn’t let me in.”

“You are very uptight.” (This one makes me laugh, because it is true. But I also like that about myself. I’m not go with the flow. I like structure. I like rules. I like order. But I also think I’m a lot of fun… Maybe I’m not that fun…)

“You’re too hard to get to know.”

“You were too quick to get upset, and you weren’t willing to talk things out.” (In my defense, deal-breaking issue, so yes, I walked away.)

“Never felt like you were really in it.”

After the multiple stabs in the heart from these guys, I had to sit with their truth.

I felt terrible.

I was fully engaged…. I wanted to be in these relationships. I believed I was very giving and loving and a very good partner.

They felt differently.

I was the common denominator. What I thought, didn’t matter. These two wonderful men felt the same way about me–I’m difficult.

I wondered if I was the same way toward my husband. Maybe he never felt close to me.

And then the crying started all over again.

Eve